Usually every blog post is a mockery of people who have messaged me (or Agent Blue) with ridiculous messages...and I will get to that (because it never ends). But I did want to start out with positive news (on this blog? What?)

I had a date last night with a nice guy. No, I mean it. He was nice and respectful and sweet. A mythical creature I was sure did not exist. And our date? Fantastic. We went bowling. It's the first fun date I have been on. Ever. (Wow, that is sad - I mean, I guess I have had other relatively good dates, but not fun ones like this). Of course, there was that nervous awkwardness that every first date produces, but it was like, a good kind of awkwardness. The kind you have when you want to impress your date and want things to go really well. And there was a good night kiss, for all of you wondering. A good one. ;-) . And talk of a 2nd date. Yay!

So I have managed to fine one good guy online. But for every one guy, I have been approached by 100 weird, creepy, or gross men. And what would my blog be if I didn't share those joyous experiences?

 [Again, really?]

 [Um, thank you?]

 [Yes, yes I am. Thanks for pointing that out.]

 [Wait. How sexy?]

 [A for effort. Some pick-up lines are humorous (albeit cheesy)]

 [Sigh.]

 [I read that right...right? "I am not looking for something that is courteous I want know if you don't mind? .... not courteous. Wait. Is this the slave guy???]

 [Um......WTF?]

I do not get men. I am told their brains are more logical than women, more practical. So I just don't understand any of what follows. These all came to Agent Blue within the last couple days. Weep for the men of the world, my friends. Weep for their complete stupidity.

  [I would like to point out that I got almost the exact same message from the same guy a little over a month ago (May 14th).  No originality. At all.]

 [Dammit Agent Blue, why couldn't you just have said thank you to a compliment? And you wonder why guys are dicks....wait! I guess this guy has the answer to all my blog posts. It's OUR fault these people keep messaging us ridiculous content. Instead of just taking the not-so-subtle hint, they just keep going and going and going. We should be stopping them. That's like saying a woman wants to be sexually assaulted because she wore a skimpy outfit. She's asking for it. God. What an F'ing ridiculous comment.

 [Ummm.....nope. I got nothing]

  [No. Seriously, No. There is no circumstance on this planet, or in the entire universe, for that matter, that would make this message okay in any way, shape, or form. Just No.]

  [Well, it started out as not bad. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't good, but I've definitely seen worse. That second half of the message....well, he went from sorta stalkerish to just downright disgusting. So, let's review. After you message someone telling them they have magical eyes and are the prettiest girl in the world and they don't answer you...that would be the time to stop and cut bait. Not to continue by further telling them, "missing you."  You are already blurring the lines between weird and creepy. But on the off chance that you STILL don't get it, after sending them a message that says, "watching your pic" (which does cross that line and moves you way over into creep territory) .... if that doesn't elicit a response from them, YOU DO NOT SEND ANOTHER MESSAGE - ESPECIALLY TELLING THEM YOU MASTURBATED TO THEIR PICTURE.