Looking back at all my posts, it's been a wild ride. I have been doing this online dating thing since 2009. I was 24 years old. Well, now its 2014 and I will be 29 in 2.5 months. I have been through countless profiles, had hundreds of messages, a handful of crazy dates and one person I would have been with, but that didn't work out. My last date was not good. And in a way that is difficult to put into words, I just can't do it anymore. I am not giving up on dating, but I am letting go of online dating. Its too much - the expectation of what you create in your mind and then what you see in real life. And I am not talking about my expectations, I am talking about theirs. I think people see what they want to see in a photo. And real life is so much different. Suffice to say my self-esteem is not at an all time high. I dont even think it is in a medium range. How can anyone else find me attractive or interesting if I don't? I want to find acceptance and love so much (and for so long) that I have started taking in whatever comes my way, no matter what it is.

So it's time to end it. Like I said, I am not going to stop dating. I still want love and one day a family. But I think my OLD experiment should have ended a long time ago. So I am ending it now. I do not think I will return, though I will not say never.

Thanks for reading and coming on this journey with me :-)

-PJ