Showing posts with label skout. Show all posts

In June I was stood up by a guy multiple times (I was dumb enough, to give him more than one chance). And that hit me hard. It also happened to be just before my birthday (thanks jack-ass). So I decided it was time to let go of online dating, once again. To walk away for a while. I was getting increasingly bitter and guys were getting increasingly creeper. So I bowed out. I decided it was time to reconnect with myself. Go out into the world and meet people to really connect with (re: not date). Just experience life off-screen for a while. It's been two months.

Earlier this week I met a guy, a friend of a friend, while I was with my friend and her group of friends for trivia night. He talked to me like I was just a person, not some potential fuck-buddy. He showed interest in me as a person, not just my body as a toy. It was really enjoyable to have a conversation with him. And it really highlighted how warped my mind has become from OLD. It really cast a light on how much I missed and craved real conversation and genuine niceness. It showed me how much I distrust every single man who tries to make conversation with me through a dating app (whether appropriate or not) - that I suspect the motive of said person is to get inside my pants. And why wouldn't I distrust them? All you have to do is read previous entries and it sums up the whole of my online dating experience. Dick picks and inappropriate messages. Or twelve seconds getting to know me and then asking for full body pictures and wanting to sext. Why wouldn't my first thought be the suspicion that I am just a warm body to be objectified?

It's sad because I am sure that not all guys online are like that. My friend and her fiance met online. I know a couple people with good stories and real relationships who began online. But for whatever reason that has not been my experience and it is has really affected how I see the world (and myself).

I was talking to my therapist the other day about this and about my tendency to hate my own body. And she pointed out a very real and very valid truth. I objectify myself. And yes, it is true I can trace the beginning of me doing that back to high school; that's the foundation. In that way I fell victim to an objectifying society. But the self-hating statue that was built on that foundation can be directly linked back to online dating. Because I was treated as an object there. I became an object there. And despite knowing in myself that there are a lot of great qualities that make me a great person, I am still an object.

Online dating has changed in the last five years (I should know, having been in and out of this world for the last ten). It so much less about finding real connection right now and so much more about finding a hook up, that it's changed the industry. And it's a toxic place. Will I return? Probably one day if I don't find what I am looking for in the real world. But when I do return my goal is to know myself and love myself and not let one single dick pic or inappropriate message ever make me feel like I am nothing more but  a disposable thing again. Because if I don't have that....then no amount of hope for romance and love is worth it - it's not worth hating myself. And its not worth seeing the world through a lens of distrust.

Time to go find myself.
-PJ

I am supposed to be reading. Or doing my taxes. But I can't. I just found a new online dating app and it's freaking awesome. And by awesome, of course, I mean its full of weird men, creepy men....and wait for it..... ONLINE STREAMING! Oh how did this girl get so lucky?

(I bet you are thinking, what, wait???)

These guys are literally sitting in their apartments streaming themselves as they do what they do (ick. not like that -  there are rules and apparently streams are periodically and frequently paused for review for that kind of stuff). Could this get any better though (for this blog, I mean)? Watching men be men in their own habitats? Only their own face streaming back at them....completely unencumbered by the reactions of women everywhere.

Stream# 1 - I am watching this guy ..... Clearly high and drinking. Did I mention high? Like higher than the empire state........ singing to some ridiculous rap song and talking about how ugly he is (he isn't really) and burping. And Jasmyn keeps saying he is so hot and so this ensuing argument is going on and on and on. It feels like watching teenagers. "No you're the hot one," "no you are" [enter annoying giggle here]. Jasmyn makes very little sense talking about her Popsicle-like body (and how she is the ugly one, not him) and this guy has no idea what she is saying, but he keeps talking anyway. Hell, I am sober and I had trouble following the conversation.

Stream# 2 - This guy I actually talked to for a minute. I asked him why he streams and he said its something to do. Then one of his users and he started talking about why he wasn't gay (because some guy asked him if he was...a) why would you bring that up to a bunch of women you are trying horribly to impress? and b) stereotypically, I can totally see why the guy asked). And then he wanted alcohol so he was looking to see if the store was open on Google maps and checked his bank account to see if he could afford some alcohol. Classy.

Stream# 3 - I didn't read this guys profile before clicking on his stream, so I had no idea who he was or what I was getting into (dangerous, I know). Turns out this guy is nice. He is from Europe, smart, well-spoken, and goofy at a humorous, tolerable level. Lets call him The Dutchman. He really was nice. Very gentlemanly for about 57 minutes. Nice, simple conversation. But even the nicest of men think about sex and that's about how long it took for him to ask me what color underwear I had on. *face palm* Dude, you were doing so well! I was actually impressed. I am not sure how we got to that question actually. Nothing nefarious was said before that. He is into the art of being subtle and going for the anticipation instead of the outright "lets fuck" kind of strategy; I guess that's how we weaved our way into that conversation. He never said anything like the usual suspects. Nice and smooth.

This live stream thing is an interesting dynamic because every piece of them is open and available to watch, but he can't see me or my reactions. Its like the perfect observation for a psych person (AKA me). And what makes it more interesting is how little I actually had to say. This is why silence is the best friend of police and counselors. People just talk and talk. They dislike silence, so if you say nothing, they will fill the silence. And what they say is usually so revealing. I feel like I got a good glimpse into the world of men tonight.

I think I am in love. Ha ha. The perfect dating site to.... well, not date, persay, but do exactly what I've been doing all along. Just let guys be guys and watch as they give themselves the rope and then hang themselves with it.

Also, The Dutchman gave me a fantastic idea as he rambled on about imagining our first date and then the second (and in his cute accent, "is that improper?"). My mother always tells me I should write a book. Especially when she reads my blog (yeah, yeah, she reads the crap all these men say to me). I always shrug off the suggestion, but now I think she has it right.... I should write a freaking romance novel. Because these guys are giving me all kinds of sexual scenarios and why waste such good editable material??? Its genius.

The Plain Jane Romance Novel Series.
Brought to you by dirty minds everywhere.

-PJ

(plainjanedating @ twitter)

There is this genuinely good guy I've wanted to date for four years (He is known, in some circles, as the Greek God; you know I like a good nickname). Ironically, I met him on Skout. You'll understand the irony once you read further...excerpts from a "reputable" dating website I have been on these days. If you look back at my previous entries, you'll note Skout has been one of those creepy dating apps with dick pics and dying declarations of love. However, these days, it's Plenty of Fish that's making me regret considering the male species suitable for a love connection. Or hell, a human connection.

It's all about the sex, it seems. Not that this is news on an online dating site, it just seems to be nothing but these days. I swear every guy has wanted to see five pictures, in addition to the 6 they already get to see on my profile. My hips, butt (uh..."booty"), and me in underwear are the most popular. And the second I say no, it's some lame excuse and then they are never heard from again. The same is true of guys who have told me they want me to come over and cuddle and "watch a movie." How stupid do I look? So I suggest a first date of dinner or drinks first (its that whole safety and getting to know someone first thing). "Oh yeah, well we could totally do dinner first. I am just super busy with work, so I might not be able to for a while..." Oh yeah, but when sex was involved it was like, "anytime works for me babe." Yeah. Real subtle.

Of course I still get the weird ones:

And the 'oh so obvious' nonchalant attempts...
And then the worst of the worst. This one actually had me speechless. He was just being....cruel for the sake of being cruel.

Yeah. Just yeah.


Oh, and of course, to nicely round of my day...
 .... to which I responded with something like, "do women really response to that?" His response? Like what? and so.... So before I can even see the message, come up with a good retort, the inevitable dick pic request comes. The next message I didn't take a screen shot of because I said, "no, I am not interested." And like any reasonable person, I thought that was enough. But no....two days ago he messages again and says.....
 


Unfortunately for me, knowing The Greek God and knowing the handful of guys that I do (both online and IRL), I know that there are good men out there. Kind, caring, compassionate decent, likeable. And I am not saying sex isn't on their mind, but its not the first thing and it isn't so....blatant. I am not quite sure why they are hiding from me. Why these jackasses keep finding me. It's like some hellish version of hide and seek. This reality tears me in two....between wanting to date because there is actually a chance I'll find someone at some point....and not wanting to date because...well, because men.


Fun times.
-PJ
(@plainjanedating on twitter)


P.S. for fun, this was the best profile picture of the week. I just don't understand people (which is saying something considering the field I am in).

Ever since I have started online dating, I have seen things I can't unseen. The things I've read or heard from men have really been enough to lose faith in the whole of the male species. I really thought by now I'd heard it all. Submission, domination, fetishes, dick pics, proclamations of undying love, cuddle buddies and friends with benefits.... but this guy....

So this guy messages me, "How crazy are you?" So I think, oh boy, just another guy looking for another weird sexual something. And I go to his profile and sure enough....

Not looking for anything serious. That's cool. Not for me, but as the curious psychology driven, blogger I am intrigued. What exactly is crazy to this guy?
 (and yes, I realize this side of me is exactly why I have heard and seen it all and lost faith in dating and romance and love). So here is his answer.......



So...that's a new one.
And apparently, to him, kids are nothing serious. That's sightly frightening. I politely declined, but now I am sort of wishing I had held onto this conversation. Not because I am interested in having a baby with a random stranger who thinks kids are some casual thing...but because I'd love to know this baby daddy's plan. How do we raise this kid? Co-parenting? Do we share family events? And who pays for things? Split it down the middle, going halfsies? Do you just want to be a part-time daddy? Why do you even want kids? All good questions that I'd love to know the answers to. Mostly, I really just wonder why on earth he would go about having a kid this way, but I suppose it makes a kind of sense. It's certainly cheaper and faster than adoption or finding a surrogate. It is consensual and there is the added bonus of not having to be tied down in a marriage or relationship, cause it's just for funsies.

Now I really do think I've heard it all.

-PJ
(@plainjanedating)

It's been a while since I have dated. It's been a while since I have wanted to. Just read any of my previous blogs and you'll understand why. It's not exactly a mystery. What is a mystery is where have all the good guys gone? The ones who will just have a conversation with you about normal, non-sex related things. I swear they were out there...at some point. Now? I am beginning to wonder if they were only a figment of my wishful imagination.

One thing has changed since my last blog post in May. Now, instead of guys asking if you want to see their dick, they ask if you want to see their "naughty." No. I am not joking. Four people in the past four days (three of them today alone) asked me if I wanted to see their naughty. It's a silly name, like saying it that way makes it more acceptable?  But the question alone still mystifies me. Why would I want to see your dick? Why? You've see one, you've seen them all. I understand a guy's penis is solidly tied to his ego and in order to be successful in the dating world that ego needs to be stroked (oh God, no pun intended), but that does not mean I need to actually see your dick. Or stroke it for that matter. But that's another blog for another time.

Today I had a very long day of talking to men from POF. A lot of insecure men. Like when I went to dinner and this guy got all pissy that I didn't talk to him for two hours. High maintenance anyone? Or the one who saw my full body picture, told me I had a big butt (a risky statement - that could go either way) and that he liked it (although the picture of my full body in no way actually shows my butt, so....) and then when I didn't answer him (because I'd been sleeping... shocking, how we women like to sleep), he got all mad because he assumed I was mad about the big butt comment. I didn't care either way, but thank you for removing yourself from my list by being oh-so-dramatic about your own comment about MY butt. Seriously.

I made the choice to start dating again....I thought I was ready to be back online. I must have repressed all the drama because I swear it wasn't like this last time around. The dick pic thing, yes, but the drama of these boys....wtf? Four days in and already I want out.

That can't be a good sign.

-PJ

(@plainjanedating

So why can't all men do these small gestures of kindnesses.

-PJ

(@plainjanedating)

I've been unemployed for a while now, but I think I have found the perfect job: helping men with their profiles so that they don't scream at the very least, "very creepy" and at the most, "serial killer." I've received quite a few messages this week. The following are just a few of the best (re: worst). I will show you my talents of explaining what NOT to post in your profile and messages.

Here is one example:

Um....gosh, so much to say. Where to start? Where to start? How about I just say - no creepy face masks that make you look like a serial killer. I mean why? What was this guy thinking? This photo is sure to bring in the ladies? No, no it won't. Because it's creepy. And it makes me think you may just turn me into a skin suit. And ladies, if, by some complete lapse in judgment, you consider this guy, let me refer you to example two:















I blocked out his face out for privacy, but I'll tell you what he was doing. He was mirroring the creepy clown picture behind him. Yeah. That's just. Well, you know.



















So I would like to open this business and offer consulting for people on dating websites. I would almost do it for free because I almost feel sorry for this guy (and whomever he messages). He is never going to get a date with pictures like these. I guarantee it. But perhaps I'm wrong. Maybe there is a Ms. Creepy for this clown-loving-face-mask-wearing guy. Love comes in all forms I guess.

This business is not all about the pictures either. I would also like to help guys write their initial messages to a woman. I've gotten a lot of great examples this week. this first one is, I hope am sure is a typo. Because otherwise, it's just creepy.


Yes. That's it. The entire message. Did he forget to put "will?" As in, "I will find you" ??? (hello creepy!) Or maybe he was writing the message, accidentally hit send, realized his mistake and.... didn't write another message finishing his thought? Ummm.....let's just move on.







Of course I have gotten a few astrology sign messages in my day. They always give me a laugh.

I don't keep up on astrology, but I am pretty sure two Geminis dating is a recipe for disaster. Obliviously he doesn't know that. Or he does know and wants to give it the ol' college try. Perhaps we are destined to be greater than the fate that the astrological world predicts. Or something.





Then, of course, there is relocation and domestic partnership:



"Hi, I don't know you, but would you up and move your whole life for me so we can be wed and you can be my housewife? You'll never have to work again. I promise. There is just one catch. You'll have to live in the basement with these custom chains I had made just for you. They have, uh, diamonds on them. See? I promised you one ring, but I am so awesome I am going to give you two. Oh yes, and I forgot, its such a dangerous neighborhood, so I will, of course, be putting bars on the windows and locking the door. Its for your protection, you see." So, apparently this is not just a dating website, but a mail-order bride website. Or the start of a really bad serial killer movie. Please, please, please tell me no one actually falls for this???


This next one is my favorite.
Aside from boasting about his prince Albert piercing, it's mostly because it is so lazy and unimaginative. The guy basically copied his profile into his message. Not even all of it. These must be the tantalizing bits he thinks will win me over. Ravish and drain? I'm curious. If your imagination spreads so thin that you have to resort to copying and pasting your lines from profile to message, exactly how do you plan on ravishing me? I think it probably takes a bit of creativity; I mean to ravish and drain someone indicates some skill and skill in this arena usually indicates the ability to be creative. You aren't exactly exuberating confidence here. Oh, I get it. That's what Prince Albert is for. You're bad in bed and he makes up for it; does the heavy lifting. Got it.


Personally, I think I could make a fortune. Do you realize this is just a tiny sample of poor message/profiles in the vast space of online dating? I don't have any statistics, but I wager its a very high percentage of men that have something similar to one of these examples and, not surprisingly, they aren't attracting a lot of positive attention. It's like a profitable service for the individual man and a kind of community service for women everywhere.

Plain Jane's Guide to Online Dating is officially in business.

-PJ

Every once in a while I write something about safety. I read this article and thought it deserves a post.

Online Dating Has Created a New Type of Sexual Predator

"It's a tricky situation," says Scott Berkowitz, the president and founder of the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN), echoing the NCA study's wariness about the potential danger in the "increased trust and intimacy" that can develop in online relationships—a little more than half the reported incidents began with communication that included "sexual content" before a face-to-face meeting.

I have learned you don't talk about sex before you meet. Even casually. A real gentleman will respect those boundaries without me even having to set them.

It's also important to always let someone else know you're going on a Tinder date in case something goes bad.

They say a TINDER date, I say EVERY date. Before I go on a date I write down the name and number of the person, where we are going and what time. And I always, always, tell someone about my date, and check in before and after it's over. And I usually try and do this for the first few dates because there is nothing stopping a sexual predator for waiting and luring you into trusting them before making their move. Guys always think this caution is silly, but as a woman, its essential.  Any guy who isn't okay with it never gets a date. If they aren't comfortable in making me feel safe, I don't want to date them.

I mock and joke about dick picks and sexualized conversation on here, but I take this stuff seriously if I am interested in meeting someone. So should anyone (guys included) when dating. It's just smart.

-PJ

I took a small hiatus from Skout, which was nice. And then I logged in. And bad messages happened. Of course I will share, don't worry.

My co-worker has joined the online world and the differences between the messages she receives and the ones I receive are like night and day. We compared messages. She gets creepy messages too, but they are more 'I want to love you forever' creepy and my are the 'overtly sexual' kind of creepy. The difference is the sites, of this I am sure. She is on match and I am on POF, okcupid and Skout. So, really it does matter which site you use; although I have never had success with match in a good way, and it's hard to justify spending a lot of money on something that has been consistently a bust.

Now that she is doing the OLD thing, we have a lot of conversations about dating. I've shared a few of the messages I get with my co-workers. If men only knew what a laugh my entire office gets when they message me...come to think of it, if men only knew what a laugh everyone on FB and on this blog gets....think it would deter them? Me either. Which is why this blog will exist until I get married, which, at this point.... well, you'll see.

And of course, who could read this blog and not feel satisfied without the messages that proposition me for sex or mentioning their penis? They are the classics. Can't deprive you of those.




[No. Just, no.][See above.]

I am going to go on two rants tonight (and of course share some pictures, because what would this blog be without those treasures?).

Rant One: Communication. I have said this all before, but I am continually surprised by how little people communicate properly. I am talking with a couple of guys and it's me asking the questions and them answering the question and then....nothing. That's it. So then I have to ask another question, same thing, and then another question... It's a never ending cycle. 1.) This is not an interview. 2.) If you don't make an attempt to get to know me, how are you going to know if we are compatible? Am I no more than a pretty face? Now before you go on saying that's just how guys are, let me tell you this: I know guys who can carry on a reciprocal conversation quite easily, so it's not just the gender itself (and stop stereotyping!). Are they lazy? Do they just not care about the answers? It's incredibly annoying. And oh so common. I am sad to say.

End rant One.

Rant Two: I recently read this article from NBC News story Meet the Woman Behind 'Perv Magnet,' a Project Documenting Online Harassment. The story is interesting enough (and lets women everywhere know that they are not alone!). Admittedly, I would not have taken it as far as her, posting who they really are, name and picture. I, at least, keep a little confidentiality. I mean, they are still creepy assholes, but still, I feel its only right. But I think I like the article because it is FINALLY shedding some light onto a subject nobody talks about: Social media and harassment. Because that really what it is, if you have to give it a name. Sending a penis picture or talking about your penis is, in effect, a form of sexual harassment. I don't ask for it, I don't want to know about your penis and I definitely don't want to see your penis.  I am just saying. Really, though, it was the comments on FB that made me annoyed enough to rant about it.

"Quit attention whoring babe... U aint all that and it aint made outa gold either... Lol. You really saved 10 years worth of messages from the internet to make yourself feel "in demand"??most people i know would have deletes,ignored and moved on Someone needs to get a life.." I won't even comment on the grammar (as I shudder reading it). It's not about feeling "in demand" or needing a life. It's about showing a side of the social media culture that women have to deal with and making people AWARE.

"Men are wired with sex as #1 priority. Women should understand this & manage THEMSELVES appropriately. Doing a study that proves men are sex fiends means nothing. Most people already know this. There are men everywhere to observe. Is not a secret." Men are wired with sex as a #1 priority? Oh please. So they should get to say whatever sexual comment they want, whenever they want it? I don't think so. You wouldn't let a guy walk up to you and say something wildly sexual or touch your breasts in any other social setting would you? No, because its inappropriate. But according to you, they should be allowed because sex is their #1 priority and that's just how they are. Idiot.

"Here's a thought... If you're going to be offended by pervy comments, DON'T post pics of yourself in your undergarments for all to see" My problem with this comment is that it puts all the responsibility of these inappropriate messages on the girl and her alone. She should be able to post whatever photo she likes without fearing guys will be disgusting pigs about it. Men DO have the ability to NOT say pervy things to a woman just because her picture is provocative. They CHOOSE to say such comments. They make the intentional effort to write out a message (or enclose a dick pic). Should they not have to take responsibility for their actions just because they have dicks and "sex is their number one priority?" F that! It might not be wise for a woman to post a picture in their underwear, but it doesn't mean that they should be subjected to sexually explicit messages that they didn't ask for. That's like saying a woman who wears a shorter dress deserves to be raped - they were asking for it. It's ridiculous.

"I'm lucky guys don't find me attractive lol oh wait....maybe it's also cause I don't dress and show myself off? yeaa...could be that too" Again, see my above comment.

There were tons more comments that I rolled my eyes at (or got downright angry at!). But I think I will just prove my point in my own way. First of all, let me say I have NO pictures on any of my profiles in which I am in just my underwear or not fully clothed. I have nothing provocative in pictures or on my profile that could be construed as suggestive in any way. And I still get these messages. It isn't because she wore skimpy clothes or is in her bra or whatever. It just happens. Regardless. And men, you too should be offended because people are summing up your gender as a bunch of pervy men that just can't help themselves! Like you have no self-restraint or manners. And women, they are basically suggesting we should just let it go because "that's how men are." The worst argument I have ever heard for men showing a woman pictures of their penis or writing sexually aggressive messages to them. Seriously!

But let me show you a few that I've gotten over the last few weeks:

And that's just a few. I'm holding back the rest for another blog. It's everywhere. I make a lot of jokes about it on this blog, but the truth is, its not only disrespectful and gross, but in some cases it really is sexual harassment. It is a real problem on social media, only that people not only don't take seriously, but write off as "normal" behavior for men! That, perhaps, is what is the most disgusting, more so than the messages themselves; it's the attitude about them.


Until next time,
PJ

I know I said I was taking a break. And I am. But two things have come across my desk that I wanted to share because they so relate to this OLD world. First, an appropriate 101 on sending dick pics (thanks to Elizabeth for sharing)

And then I ran across this gem of an article and I want to post it everywhere for all men to read. They won't, of course. They can't even read a short paragraph on a profile, but ah, a girl can dream.

How To Sext (full article here)

My favorite quotes:


"Start Small. Be gentle and a bit ambiguous at first, suggests Astroglide’s resident sexologist, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess says some examples of great starters you could try may be:
See, a how-to guide right at their feet. And yet....I bet I will still get offers to see guy's nether regions because somehow they think that is sexy. It's not. Wait. Let me repeat that for anyone who might have missed it.  

IT'S NOT.

You know, they say women are mysteries....but the truth is men just don't listen when they should. Like. Right. Now. 

I am so sick of platitudes. Men telling me how (enter word here) I am. And it runs the gamut too.

Beautiful
Insanely beautiful
Sexy
Cute
Crazy pretty
Absolutely gorgeous
Utterly gorgeous
Really hot
a hot babe
Amazingly stunning
Absolutely stunning
"The Most beautiful girl I have seen on this application"
"You are so blessed with beauty and curves"
"Cute, sweet and beautiful."
"Most beautiful lady I have ever seen"
"Cuteness overload"
"Now I believe angels exist

I am sorry, but I am not the most beautiful woman in the world, nor am I the most beautiful woman you have ever seen - unless you have kept your eyes closed for the majority of your life. I am getting very annoyed at men who keep telling me things like this. It's not that I have low self-esteem. I don't question my beauty. I know men who tell me I am beautiful and I believe them. The key difference, I think, is those men are sincere and I can tell they are sincere. These other guys...not sincere. Most of them just want a blow job or a quickie. At the very least they want to see my breasts and show me their penis (which I do not want to see, contrary to what they think) and sext. My favorite one is how much they want to cuddle. With me, a complete stranger. Cause it's "so nice and comforting to just cuddle with someone" (who cares if you don't even know them). It's more like they believe wanting to cuddle is their ticket into my pants. It's not. I am increasingly frustrated how much of this I encounter on dating websites (yes, I am back on dating websites :( ). Where are the guys who just want a nice conversation to start and maybe a couple days of texting (note: not sexting) before setting up a date? Everyone is so quick to get my number and go out on a date with me. They don't even take the time to get to know me, even a little. Everything is so shallow and superficial. Including all the compliments.

This isn't even a good sarcastic blog - this is just the writings of a frustrated woman that does not want platitudes from every guy on their first or subsequent messages (overkill much?). If you genuinely believe I am beautiful, that's cool and much appreciated. But don't start out with any one of those above sentences. I would reply to a "hey" only message rather than a "you're stunningly gorgeous" message any day. The one word greeting seems more sincere than the fake compliment.

I am laying off the blog for a while. I am getting a lot of material for my mocking block, it's true, but I am really not in a place where it's funny. I am a little bitter at the moment and writing about all this just isn't fun (and that is how it should be on here). I'll be back. I am sure.

Until then,
-PJ

Skout is never disappointing. Well, let me re-phrase. Skout never disappoints to give me material for the mocking block. It does, however, make me disappointed in men. But I suppose Skout isn't to blame for that. Men are.

My dating activity has been pretty slow because I took myself off all the dating sites (as I am dating someone, yay!). Even though I am unavailable, I still want to be able to blog a little, so I turn to Skout. I should first point out that on my Skout profile it says I am only interested in friends and chatting. Apparently though, that doesn't really matter to people. I've gotten probably over 50 new chat requests. Most are that stupid, lazy "So and So Winked at you" crap. But I've had some real winners.